Islamic Feminism

Who’s superior? The man or the woman?

Feminism has been a subject of dispute this days. Our sisters are angry! Veins popping with red eyes. All energy vent on this same topic! Our sisters want to break through the glass ceiling and show they’re capable!

 ‘What a man can do, a woman can do better’ they say. 

‘No, we are not below the men!’

Different chants... so calm down sis. Breathe in, breathe out. Steady? Go ahead and read this then use the comment box and tell me what you think. May Allah bless you as you do. So i have this riddle for you which i will like you to sort out after reading this. 

So for example: You went to a market to purchase a pair of shoe, you went on and chose the most fancy one and wore it to see if it fit. On a blink, your eyes saw a flashy bag hanging, you looked at the shoe you just tried laying on the floor among the shoes of it’s like then you looked at the cashier and said: i want this shoe, package it for me before i finish having a glance at this bag. He smiled. ‘The black shoe?’ He asked and you nodded. He packaged it whilst you take a look at the bag. After a minute, you went to him and paid for the shoe. When you got home so happy that you’ve a new shoe and you’re so eager to try it on, you found out that the shoe isn’t in a pair rather you have two shoes for right leg. You tried the other on your left leg but it refused to fit. It was looking sideways! So aren’t the shoes the same? Equal? All right legs? Not a pair? Why didn’t they fit then? Why can’t you wear them like that? (Awaiting answers in the comment box).

So back to business. Iwant to understand your take. Of course, ( Inna akramakum indAllahi atqakum) One thing i believe is, in the course of ibadah and worshipping Allah we are all equal— one is superior when they have more taqwa.

In the normal life perspective, like we are not objects of comparison. Men are men and women are women. And at the end we are all humans so we should have same roles and whatnot.

In marriage, we are not EQUAL. We all have different roles, rights and stands. Here, the husband commands the wife and therefore he is SUPERIOR. I have a hadith and an ayah to justify my statement. The hadith said: Allah has placed his pleasure in the pleasure of a woman’s husband in the sense that, when she pleases her husband it’s like she pleases Allah.  YET, the qur’an described husband and wife to be like garments for each other. So many hadith show that you’re patners, you’re friends and you’re companions. Marriage is not slavery. Please reset that mindset. Marriage is Ibadah. Worship. Wallahi if it wasn’t set this way, the kids born before (our forefathers) wouldn’t be the way they were. There’s logic behind everything Wallahu A’alam.

And again, before you come for me(lol) whatever good the husband does to the wife, he’s also pleasing Allah. He also have some rights over her and vice versa. So, if the woman would heed to the command of her husband, please him and whatnot, that means he’s above her. And that’s because he takes care of her (Arrijalu qawwamuna alannisaa bi ma faddalallah...) 

So I’m sorry to say, the female gender is not equal to the male. But, all have different roles. We were not created to be equal and the sole of this life is to worship Allah so why worried about who is superior and who is not? (Wama kalaqtul jinna wal insa illa liya’abudun).

All these explanations do not mean women are inferior, mind you.

Come to think of it, the prophet SAW said, kindness to your mother thrice. And a man’s Jannah is beneath her feet. The father is the middle gate to Jannah. So you see this draws back to my point above. “ We have different roles, we work together, no one is superior or inferior.”

To top and wrap it all: The quran says, “Wa bil walidaini ihsana..” kindness to BOTH parents. Not mother only, not father only. Both.

So, my point is that we are all the same in the eyes of Allah with regards to worship and who’s above is who worships Allah most.

The talk of superiority and inferiority is something not important. The bottom line we are all partners, we work together.

Look, a man’s way to Jannah (one of the simplest ways) is pleasing his mother.

A woman’s way to Jannah (one of the simplest ways) is pleasing her husband.

Now tell me who’s superior?

I wonder why our folks open mouth and talk heedlessly! Islam has made us queens.

When we are daughters, Islam says we should be taken cared of, every single necessity of life should be provided for us till we are married. When we become wives, we are under the care of our husbands and it’s a must for them to cater for us and treat us with humility and kindness. Even in divorce, Islam provided shelter for us and commands the men to part with us in humility. The prophet SAW said the best of husbands are those who are kind to their wives. When we become mothers, our kids take care of us in kindness and their Jannah lies beneath our feet. (Ummuka, thumma ummuka, thumma umuka). 

So tell me, what else are we crying for? What else do we need?

I understand the men in our lives do not do what they’re supposed to do. That’s the society’s fault, the men and whoever takes part but not ISLAM’s fault.

I don’t know but i think western ideologies are filling up our brains and making us act docile whilst Islam has paved the way, so clear. 

Think about the right to marry multiple wives. Islam has always want to be fair on everyone. If we have one husbands to ourselves what of our fellow sisters? It’s known that we outnumber the men due to health issues and nature.  One man, one woman, where will the rest go? 

We want power, what a man can do a woman can do. No sis, it doesn’t work that way darling. All those thoughts are due to our selfish reasons and arrogance. Islam does not support any of this. Islam is the religion of justice!

I doubt if you get the logic behind a man being above a woman in matrimony. Imagine if divorce was to be in our hands. We will divorce this men thousand times a day! It’s the reality. We are too emotional and we lack that deep understanding that men have! Believe it or not. At the end of the day, the whole world would just be abnormal. You get the point, i know. Don’t even dodge it.

Imagine if this men are under us, we will punish them wallahi. I am a woman and I know we all think alike, this men will suffer in our hands. But islam chose the man because of his way of thinking differs. A man sees beyond what’s at hand even in anger but us, women? I better keep mute. You’re laughing because you know the truth.

This life is a test, a board of examinations. In one way or the other Allah tests us to get to the next level. Why don’t we focus on building our next level rather than focusing on stuff that will only benefit us in this temporary home? Wallahi if you set your mind to Ibadah, for Allah’s sake everything will be easy for you.

So, i ask again. Now, who is superior?

May Allah grant us Hidaya, makes us the coolness of the eyes of the people in our lives. May we get to Jannah at the end. Ameen.

AeshaKabir.

31st March 2021